When you’re surrounded by successful people constantly celebrating their big wins, it’s easy to start feeling small. And before you know it, these people who you’ve always looked up to as inspiration are now starting to look a lot more like your competition. You may start envying them, wondering why you can’t have what they have.

This tends to happen because you’re comparing your own success to theirs. While it may feel easier to wallow and wonder why you don’t have what they have, it’s best to avoid playing the comparison game — or at least use it for motivation, not self-pity.

Here are some do’s and don’ts to help guide you through this mindset shift.


It’s really easy to fall into the trap of being obsessed with what you don’t have. But try to resist doing that. While it might take a little more mental energy, being aware and grateful for all the wins and good things in your life is so important. This will help you feel more secure about yourself but most importantly, help you focus on what you do have… And not what you may think you are lacking.


Why are you comparing yourself to other people’s successes when you could be comparing yourself to… well, yourself?!

What were you doing five years ago? What do you want to achieve in the next year? Take a look at how you can be improving yourself instead of how you compare to other people. Take that focus off those people you envy and bring it back towards what matters: you.


Lastly, it’s important to remember that not everything that sparkles is gold. Oftentimes, people only show us what they want us to see. This is all too common in the days of curated social media images. We can never really know what the reality of another person’s situation, especially through what they show off on the internet.

This is why it’s best to not compare yourself to their success. Because if you were to learn the truth behind their success, you may not be as envious as you are right now.

Next time you find yourself feeling small, or jealous of someone else’s wins, remember that to become successful, you need to be focused on the finish line, and not on the people who are ahead of you. They’re simply a distraction from what matters: your end goal.